vampires, spaceships, and fantastical worlds—the tales of L.E. Teetzel

I’m not big on New Year’s resolutions, probably because I’m not very good at sticking to them, or adhering to self-imposed deadlines or challenges or anything like that; I’m a weird, probably autistic mess of a being who likes routine and structure but only to a point. I also hate exercise, so you can imagine how well I stick to anything revolving around that.

But I digress.

I didn’t set any resolutions for myself this year, and I didn’t set any firm goals, either. Instead, I decided to focus on the fact that 25 is my favourite number (I like things in groups of 5 and 5 groups of 5 is 25), and that meant I should make this year about me. And that’s the plan.

That sounds self-absorbed, and it is, to a degree, but I don’t mean it in a bad way.

I don’t think I’m doing this very well—I’ll just jump in.

So since I started knitting and crocheting in 2015/2016, I’ve mostly made things as gifts, commissions, or to sell. Even though there are piles of yarn and so many patterns I’ve purchased for projects for myself. I’ve made so, so few of them. For example, I started this blanket in 2020 and just finished it. Five years later. So this year I’m going to try to make more stuff for myself. I will still make stuff for others and to sell but on a smaller scale.

And when it comes to the more traditional resolution-type things, I’m not going to let myself get caught up in the superficial aspects of it. I’ve been working for a long time to achieve self-confidence as a fat woman, and I am in a good place now. Still working on great, but I’m miles ahead of where I was even a couple years ago. But the truth is I am fat and it does affect every aspect of my life. So this year I’m going to continue making small changes in diet and exercise and stretching to work towards lasting improvements. I don’t care if I lose weight or anything like that—I just want to be able to move and live and thrive.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to afford many tattoos this year (working on my financial habits is something else I’ll be doing because money gives me anxiety and I need to get a better handle on it), but I’m going to try. Tattoos are huge in my journey to self-confidence and loving my body (instead of hating it or being indifferent to it). I love carrying art on my skin and I love supporting my tattooist friends and their gorgeous designs.

But most important is my writing.

As I’ve already announced, I’ll be publishing my first novel, An Errant Ray of Sunlight, on May 4th of this year. I’m currently finishing the final edit and it’s proving a more difficult journey than I expected. I started this book in university and though it’s vastly different than it was then, it’s obviously been a big part of my life for a very long time—far too long, but better now than never. But the closer I get to being done and the closer May gets, the more it feels like excising a piece of my soul. That might sound dramatic, but it’s the truth. This last bit is going to be very hard, but so, so worth it no matter how the book is received.

I’m really excited and horribly scared to release An Errant Ray of Sunlight into the world, and I hope you’re going to love it as much as I do.

After ERoS is out in the world, I’ll be jumping into Book #2, A Burning in the Blood.

And, you know, trying to market my books and all the extra stuff I wanna make for them. But that’s a whole other thing that scares me.

But this is the year I really start treating my writing like another job so I can make a real go of this indie author thing. It’s terrifying, as I only really know publishing from one side, but again, I’m excited about it. And excited to have real-life and internet friends coming along with me for this journey.

In that same vein, I may start treating this blog as a bit more of a newsletter and doing a bit update post once a month (that’s my goal anyway). I don’t know for sure yet what that’s going to look like or when it’ll come out, but with the tempestuous nature of social media (and the way it seems to all be heading into red-hat hell) and the way it affects my mental health, having a solid place I can promote and talk about my work seems like the best plan. So keep your eyes open for that and subscribe if you wanna stay on top of things!

I do want to do more regular blog posts too, but my writing goals are already ambitious enough, so we’ll just have to see what happens, I guess.

I have a lot of hopes and plans for this year, but mainly I’m going to continue to be kind to myself and do things I enjoy. That make me happy. That’s really the best thing I can do for myself while everything is so uncertain and frightening.

Twenty-five might be my favourite number, but I hope the year is good to you all on a personal level if not on the big-picture level. Times are tough, but do what makes you happy, be kind to others, and don’t be afraid to chase your dreams no matter how scary they are.

Take it easy, hot dogs. 💙

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