vampires, spaceships, and fantastical worlds—the tales of L.E. Teetzel

Welcome!

Another month that flew by. Like, absolutely rocketed by. Just—woosh. I can’t believe tomorrow is April (mostly because that means I only have a month to come up with enough money for my tattoo appointment in May and that it’s almost my 36th birthday).

At least I’m getting this newsletter/post done on time.

Though I did leave it until today to write, so…

March in the Rearview

Mentally, this month was a lot of up and down, and I’m sure a lot of other people felt the same with what’s happening in the world. It’s a lot—it’s too much. Human beings were not meant to process this much information, this much trauma, this much horror… It’s awful and scary and it means that a lot of people are existing with their brains just soaking in cortisol. I’ve had to very closely monitor how much time I’m spending on social media to protect my mental health, and then figure out how to handle the guilt that comes with stepping back when it feels like the only thing I can do to help right now is pay attention, to spread the word, to not be quiet. But I have to keep reminding myself that I need to keep myself as healthy as I can if I want to be of any use to anyone, let alone any use to myself.

Because we live in a capitalist nightmare and somehow we’re all expected to earn money while shit falls apart.

Sorry—I don’t mean to be a downer, but everything is a struggle lately, and trying to pretend like I’m fine and everything is shiny and bright is bullshit and doesn’t help anyone. I also like to be upfront and honest about my mental health because it affects everything I do so heavily.

Case in point, I got sick twice this month, felt like shit physically and could barely do anything, which made me feel like shit physically, which translated into me spending too much money on books when I’m supposed to be saving money (for the aforementioned tattoo but also for other things).

However, the month wasn’t all bad. Far from it. I had a lot of good days this month too, and got a lot of stuff done that’s helped me feel in control and settled and happy. I set a lofty goal (moving into my dream apartment in my hometown in the next couple years), an ambitious but achievable goal (write a novella in addition to another novel this year—more on that below), and an easy goal (starting my mostly daily walks again, either outside or on my brother’s treadmill). I organized and cleaned, and while I’m not quite done all the organizing and cleaning I want to do, I’m not on any sort of time limit, so it’s nice to have little things to get done every day. Accomplishing something each day that’s outside of work/eat/sleep/etc. is a real boost to the mood and, for me, self-esteem and happiness. They don’t have to be big things; yesterday, I literally just tided up my desk so I had a clear spot to put a candle (which came in really handy today since my brother’s dog got sprayed by a skunk last night, yayyyyy).

I also finally managed to get my online store up and running, which you can find here!

You can buy an .epub file for Icarus straight from me, as well as signed copies of Icarus, signed bookplates, and an assortment of things I’ve crocheted, knit, sewn, or made. There’s not too much up there right now, but I’m working on getting some more stuff made and posted. Also, once An Errant Ray of Sunlight comes out on May 4th (pre-order now!), you’ll be able to buy .epubs and signed copies of that as well.

Also, just for fun, I put up some merch for An Errant Ray of Sunlight up on my Redbubble store! (These aren’t great screencaps but you can get a better look on the site.)

I have some more ideas for merch but it’ll sort of just depend on how much time I have and if I feel like making anymore. I also don’t expect anyone to actually buy anything—I just made this for fun and because I want a Ridge City University sweatshirt. 😂

I also made some goofy little bat stickers/pins that are up on Redbubble too.

These little dudes have been hanging out on my iPad for ages, so I just tided them up and posted them as little doodle stickers. I love bats. (Shocking, I know.)

From the Story Files

The biggest news, of course, is that An Errant Ray of Sunlight is with my proofreader! I’ve finished the layout for the ebook and physical book and, once I have it back from the proofreader, it’ll be done, which is SO exciting!

I also got my proof copy from Amazon and nearly lost my mind flipping through it. I cannot fully express how much it means to finally see this beast in person.

I’ve also started planning and drafting the sequel to An Errant Ray of Sunlight, of course, since I’m hoping to have that out later this year. It’s strange returning to this world but not in book one after so long of only thinking about/writing book one, ya know? It’s exciting but scary too and I’m dealing with a lot of thoughts like “What if I don’t remember how to write in this world?” and “What if the characters stop talking to me?” I know I can overcome these things if they do happen, but it’s still daunting. I’m just trying to focus on the excitement, and the idea of revealing the title and back-cover copy sooner rather than later. 👀

Additionally, you may have noticed I mentioned a novella above… And yeah, there’s been a sci-fi/horror idea hovering around in my brain for a while and, one night while I was falling asleep, a format for said idea as well as a more developed plot popped into my head and I knew I had to work on it. I was only thinking about jotting some stuff down to get it out of my brain, but no, it looks like I’ll be writing the whole thing before moving on to the sequel to An Errant Ray of Sunlight. Which is unexpected, but awesome.

If I can get a novella out this year as well as another novel, I’ll be so happy and proud of myself.

Of course, I’ll still be happy and proud of myself if I just get another novel out, but you know what they say—shoot for the stars.

In My Eyeballs and Earholes

Books

This was another month where I managed to read a bunch, partly in thanks to being sick and spending a day in bed where all I did was read. I read a mix of comics and novels and I’m just feeling so excited about books right now. I mean, I usually am, but I wish I could just spend all day reading all the time.

The stand-out read this month was Sunrise on the Reaping by Suzanne Collins. I’m a huge fan of the Hunger Game series, and while it could have remained a favourite without any further books or anything, both additions Collins had made have been great, but Haymitch’s story broke me. I sobbed for a solid five minutes after finishing the book and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since, especially because the messages of this series somehow just get more and more poignant (and Collins gets less and less subtle). I reread the original trilogy last year when I finally got around to reading A Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes, but I think I might reread it again already? And rewatch the movies. I can’t wait to see the Sunrise on the Reaping movie too. I’m way out of touch when it comes to fandoms, but the Hunger Games series is, in my opinion, the best book-to-screen adaptation and seeing how the world is both familiar and different in these prequels is a great source of joy for me. Sunrise on the Reaping should be really interesting, given how many familiar faces are in this one.

I also finished the Old Man Logan graphic novels that are out, started reading Ta-Nehisi Coates’s run of Captain America which is so far quite good. I love Steve Rogers so much. I finished the Atlas series by Olivie Blake and while I was disappointed and had to slog through them, I’m still glad I read them. I read a couple more Stranger Things graphic novels which were also enjoyable and The Temple of Ybwen made me tear up.

The rest of the month was taken up by romances: A Cosmic Kind of Love by Samantha Young (deeply my jam, frustrating and charming); Yours Truly by Abby Jimenez (felt deeply represented by the mmc who was an anxious, probably autistic, introverted nerd); and It Happened One Summer and Hook, Line, and Sinker by Tessa Bailey (which were enjoyable and easy to read but her writing style rubs me the wrong way sometimes).

I’m currently reading Carry On by Rainbow Rowell and am planning to devour the rest of the trilogy afterward, and have a couple Beth O’Leary romances waiting for me at the library.

Did I need to go to the library when I have literally hundreds and hundreds of books I own and haven’t read yet? No, but sometimes you just gotta follow the library urge.

Movies

I only watched one movie this month, but it was The Substance, so that’s okay. That movie is WILD and not what I expected at all. For about 90% of the movie, I couldn’t figure out if I actually liked it or not, but I was having fun watching it, so it didn’t really matter. The performances are top-notch and the visuals are incredible, but the ending—oh my GOD. As soon as the final sequence started, I was like, “Yes, I love this movie. What the fuck.”

Also, I really wanted to watch The Thing after it was over.

I’m going to make and effort to watch more movies (and Star Trek) so I can get back to my Three-Thoughts Retrospective series. I miss doing it.

Video Games

It was another month of just puttering around my valley in Dreamlight Valley while I listened to My Favourite Murder, which is one of the ways I relax. Sometimes I think about trying to stream video games again, but more and more they’ve become a refuge for me, and it’s probably best to keep a space like that for myself.

Although I may start making blog posts about my playthroughs and builds in The Sims 4, but that’s a big maybe, unless the builds are story-related.

Music

I literally did not listen to any music this month and I am kind of disgusted with myself. It’s time to update my Current Jams playlist and blare only that when I’m driving so I can sing at the top of my lungs.

Parting Thoughts

Times are really, really tough right now, but I hope you all have a support system and friends and a pet or two to help you survive. I normally wish for people to thrive, but I think right now, survival is okay. Protect your health, protect your peace, stand up for others if you can, don’t be an asshole, and eat a goddamn treat once in a while.

That’s it for this month! Take it easy, hot dogs! 💙